Escape


This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 10; the tenth edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

He loved the rain and the cool breeze. Lying down on his back he watched the drama unfold in the sky.

The silence was uncanny.

Murky mist seeps through the very core of his being.

His thoughtsΒ  frozen in time.

Memories closed in like a blizzard of snow.

He shivered.

The trees, their heads bowed, cried ceaselessly.

The railway track was bone chilling.

How long?Β  He wondered.

Suddenly the tracks hummed.

The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

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37 thoughts on “Escape

  1. Ouch! So he is committing suicide? I hate it when people give up easily. x-(
    By the way, nice poem. πŸ™‚

    πŸ™‚ surprised .. well life is such and we are escaping all the time from something or the other. poem … story i thinkπŸ™‚

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  2. Last three lines had the maximum impact…actually the whole story was gr8 and I liked the fact so less words used to convey so much….

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  3. Tragic & brimming in emotions πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€
    Excellent attempt at the prompt πŸ™‚

    Keep writing and best wishes for the contest πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

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  4. I welcome all the new friends to my blog and thank all of you for the great response.
    I will shortly read your blog posts and hope we will keep leaving our views on each others blogs. Wishing the very best to all
    I feel I should again indulge in very short ficiton. hugs to all

    Keerthana πŸ˜€ I like you

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  5. Wow, I really like this. How smart, relating it to “escape” without even mentioning it. And yes, a very nice escape indeed, how much I want to travel on an Indian train…you are alluring me!

    Sureindran R. – Escape

    Thank you so much Sureindran. Loved your post too. best wishes . Glad my first attempt is appreciated

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  6. Nice one. good build up and an unexpected finish. great use of language too. best of luck for the blog-a-ton

    Thanks so much.. an open ending πŸ˜€

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  7. Is he escaping his life or escaping to live ???? I hope he doesnt give up on his life.

    Well Uma that is for you to imagine and think what next :))

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  8. Loved it… and you already know that! πŸ™‚

    [Am at work right now, and Facebook is blocked here, so cannot reply to you! I just think you should try again later – Blogger problems, would be my guess! πŸ™‚ ]

    All the best for BAT! I’m happy you participated!! πŸ™‚ πŸ˜›

    Thanks sweetheart, I was guided by Marshal also. posted the vote. thanks for visitng and commenting .Best wishes . Participated coz of you

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  9. Nice one!!! But ugh…what a way to end one’s life! πŸ˜› Seriously, overdosing is probably the easiest! Good luck for BATOM-10

    Thanks and welcome to my blog. your post was wonderful too. Best wishes
    I am trying my hand at dark fiction. πŸ™‚

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  10. The escape, which i describd thru 1500 wrds (prsn committing suicide on railway track) was portryd by u in less thn 100 :p
    I love sch short fictions, the 55 Fiction kinds!!

    It was a 55r Vipul but I thought i should make it more dramatic by adding a few lines. Glad you liked it. will be reading your posts soon. Thanks for everything

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  11. awww!!! so poignant! yet an escape from the wretched world

    self mercy killing , as i would term it….good job

    Thanks Payal. yes don’t we all find innovative ways to handle things in our life. Did he really kill himself ;D ? he loved it all too much , rain, train, tracks, nights, ..just thinking what happened next. πŸ˜‰

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  12. “And the tracks hummed…”

    sexy! πŸ™‚

    I rate this poem not just for the lines or the lyricism but more for the subtlety..

    classifying it in a particular category wld be doing injustice..

    So, calling it a beautiful ‘piece’ instead πŸ™‚

    πŸ˜€ thanks so much .. you made my day along with all the others here. heheehe yea It is a twisted piece .. Best for BAT10 and thank you so much for visiting . keep coming back for more

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  13. Oh!! That sent a shiver down the spine!!
    Awesome expression!!
    All the very best for BAT-10!!
    Cheers πŸ™‚

    Thanks Shilpa πŸ™‚ I am happy that I got the chance to participate and my work was appreciated. Best wishes to you too. Cheers!!

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  14. Beautifully told in just a few words. The last line was splendid really. Death is the only real escape, I guess. But as long as we are alive, we can’t escape ourselves, can we? Just gotta keep fighting.
    All the best for batom! πŸ™‚

    Yes you are right. While eliving actually I would not recommend escaping from anything but boldly facing and conquering it. Death is final escape into eternity .. welcome to my blog and all the best to you

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  15. brilliant! a very well told story in just a few words.. i like! all the best!

    Thanks Mehak and welcome to my blog. keep visiting

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  16. why cant it be just a long wait for a train? a passenger in some remote corner of the world….where u get just one train a day, may be? chap wants to get to the city??

    πŸ˜‰ you do not wait for the train to board it by lying down on the tracks so you?

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  17. Wow! too good. I always envy people who master at writing 55ers. Such less words but so touching. How do you manage to write? Just loved it.

    I am not so good in this 55 thing just a few I could manage in all these years of writing I think Gyanban is really cool with fiction. Read his blog. Welcome to my blog and thank you so much for your appreciation .

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