“One of the many things nobody ever tells you about middle age is that it’s such a nice change from being young”
For many people especially women , turning forty is a difficult time, a dead man’s curve on the road from youth to old age but I will always feel that you may not FEEL young AT FORTY but u can remain youthful…..youthfulness is eternal..
For me it was a whole new beginning of an adventure as I started to discover the joy life held in its treasure trove .I began to explore, reinvent and accept myself.
I felt that now was the time to live for oneself, with children all grownup and able to look after themselves, I could spend more time in doing things I wanted to do and the way I wanted to do .
Suddenly there was a tremendous desire to LIVE fully, completely.
I realized that as I grew older my kids did too and there they were young handsome boys towering over me ,my friends ,with whom I started to form a very special bond of friendship .
At forty I found my voice too. I don’t look like I’m getting older. Why the hell does everyone else? In fact I feel I look sexy and stylish now in more that one ways and get noticed and admired, than before. Those few strands of grey hair, which I thought would be the ultimate nightmare, gave me a kind of graceful look and of course an opportunity to experiment with colors from burgundy to deep brown and various others. Apart from some health issues life simply rocks at forty .
I feel way younger at 40 than I thought I would and at the same time I finally feel like a real adult.
As a friend who has known me over the last 20yrs said, ‘Tiku was a pinnanoire grape then and now she is a matured vintage wine. Amazing texture, aroma, flavor and taste for life.” It really thrilled me
I wont say turning forty made me more mature ,wise and mellow but it certainly added more charm to my plain Jane routine mundane life .
I keep the child me alive n kicking, still love to climb trees, play pranks, fight for the chocolate bar and much more but the childishness is gone.
I found that all those years before this point I just lived playing a role .either of a mother ,sister ,daughter ,wife ,lover but now I could connect with my true self ..The real ME .and do what SHE wanted to do.
This time in life also provided a great opportunity to catch up with activities and interests that I had put aside for many years. And that makes for a whole new world!!
Age is reflected in attitudes. A 25 yr old “older” than many 60 yr olds!
I became tech savvy almost around this time and that brought a revolution in my life. It may sound funny but for a woman living a life behind the closed doors, it was a passage to freedom, to fly in the fast sky which held tremendous scope for her. It expanded my horizons .Meeting different people, joining different groups online interactions helped me get over some preconceived ideas and preconceptions about people. It was a new learning process.
I was also the star of my blogging itch .before this I wrote for my own pleasure and many a times thoughts and ideas, just kept floating inside my mind struggling to fin a small open space to come out n breath but with blogging, a whole new world opened in front of me .For that I am thankful to two wonderful women friends of mine Aparna and Ritu .Two women whom I befriended online on a social networking site and formed an instant bond .I owe a lot to you girls. Thank You so much for helping me find my lost self.
I am encountering many great things about being older and looking at life from a more emotionally mature perspective.I have far better friends at 40 than I did at 20 or 30, and I value them more than I did then as well. I have been able to focus on the wonderful friends I have. Friends, who were living in some corner of the world and were just names for me, till they became an essential part of my being .I met them online and slowly formed a bond that joined our heartstrings .some of them I met others are still on SMS, calls, chats and emails but I never felt the physical distance .Each one of them enriched my life in some special way, bringing in a lot of joy n love.
In Rabindranath Tagore’s words,” Depth of friendship does not depend on length of acquaintance”.
Today, both my shyness and diffidence have reduced substantially, my self confidence has increased, which amazes me too and I know my negative and positive traits inside out. Am better equipped to deal with situations than before and take the correct decision when needed. I listen to my inner and do what my heart feel right .I was never the one for social moralities
They made me befriend myself once again and that mattered. I am thankful for my circle of amazing friends. . I feel incredibly blessed.
One of the most satisfying things that happened to me is, finally gaining the ability to de-clutter my relationships. I have been able to get to a point in which I have learned to distinguish friendships that drag me down emotionally and I am able to check myself before they cast their dark shadows over me. Have decided to set my boundaries and stick to them.
I feel at forty plus I am still young enough to learn a few new tricks and old enough to have experienced almost everything.
As someone said
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
And I, for one, am enjoying lot more such moments every day. I turned forty one yesterday and last one year has been the most memorable one for me.
Avery special thank you hug to some of my amazing online friends ….. Sujatha .Jayshree, Ritu (I feel like writing a separate blog post for her), Arun and Sita.
There are some very special people who also need to be mentioned Amit and Neeti (my God Parents)
A few others are part of me in a very personal way. And will always remain so.